Tuesday, 8pm

Thought for the Day - There will never be enough milk on the days you want cereal for breakfast

Pug Status - Tired after a long and interesting walkies

My least favourite household job today, cleaning the big oven on our range cooker. I was told to use a brilliant product called Oven Pride, which sounds to me like a huge carnival where cookers celebrate their love for fellow cookers....

I had Hertbeat on as usual, although I would say that listening to the Midday Cafe with my head in the oven was by no means a comment on Dawn's presenting style. I had one of those "chuckling to yourself" moments when the Herts Safety Camera Partnership ad came on - "It's thirty for a reason" the advert said, to which I replied "Let the reason be love". These moments are only cringe-free if you happen to be alone; a close relative of mine had a delivery job that involved visiting a security depot. The entrance was unmanned but there was a phone with a sign saying "Lift for Attention", and she always used to lift the entire phone and have a chuckle to herself before using the handset. This went on for a number of weeks until she spotted the camera above the phone and found out she was the morning entertainment for the office staff watching the monitor upstairs....

Obi Pug Kenobi's usual walk went a different route this afternoon. Some nearby trees have had all their branches chopped off, the arboreal equivalent of a skinhead presumably, and some people have taken to tying material round the trunks. I am not sure whether this is people protesting about the cull or perhaps another issue but they seem to have used a variety of different materials - apropos of nothing, as a protest song "Tie a Leopardskin Dressing Gown Cord Around The Old Oak Tree" doesn't really have the same impact....