Lazing on a Monday afternoon...

Monday, 9.30pm

Thought for the Day - Sausages cooked on a barbeque will go from frozen solid to charcoal in the time it takes you to get a beer from the fridge

Pug Status - Chewing next door's frisbee that came over the garden fence

Ah, Bank Holiday weekends. The sound of lawnmowers, the smell of barbeques, the sound of screams as grown men herniate discs carrying supermarket special packs of lager to the car. And everyone always tells you "the next Bank Holiday's not until Christmas, you know!"

A quick trip to the Galleria this afternoon turned into a full-scale operation because, as usual, I didn't have enough change for the car park. We can put a man on the moon, send information at the speed of light around the globe, but we have yet to invent a car park ticket machine that is able to give change on a Bank Holiday. So, after finding a space in the Galleria car park seemingly on the outskirts of Hertford I then had to bob in and out of queuing traffic, with all the grace of an orang utan with a bad case of piles, to buy something from a newsagent just so I could get another pound for the machine....

Sunday morning saw me driving to Norfolk to pick up a sheep. This wasn't some sort of test of strength or bizarre cab fare but a chance to re-stock our freezer with some organic produce, lovingly reared by friends of ours. They has a smallholding but it's not what you've got but what you do with it, I always say. Luckily the meat came all ready cut into joints and chops - otherwise it would have had to have driven home with a whole frozen lamb sat on the passenger seat next to me. And goodness knows how I would have explained that one away to the police if I had been stopped....

Obi Pig Kenobi was very pleased to see me when I came home, lugging a huge sack of frozen lamb across my back. I must have looked like a doggy version of Father Christmas....

Wednesday, 8pm

Thought for the Day - The one thing that you forget to take out of the car will be the first thing you need when you step through the front door

Pug Status - Eyeing up the left-over bits of garlic bread

Someone said it was very Autumnal today - I thought that was the name of the faun in 'The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe'. And, given the state of my clothes cupboard, I think mine also gives me a gateway to another world- the 1970s, judging by the look of some of these trousers....

Back to the weather and poor Princess Pug bore her daily walk with true English stoicism, although the way her ears drooped until her face was virtually oblong gave away her inner feelings. And as for the grumbling noise she was making, well, if dogs could swear I daresay she could have written her own dictionary - and judging by the shocked expression of the Pekingese we passed on the way back, I think she probably did anyway....

Wednesday night, in our household, is Spaghetti Bolognese night and tonight was no exception. So, just before sitting down to eat, I went upstairs to change into my oldest, grubbiest t-shirt. The purpose of this being, of course, that should you eat spag bol wearing anything that you would quite like to wear again, you will manage to get more sauce down your front than down your gullet. I have a Ben Sherman shirt upstairs that I could only wear now if I wanted to go to a fancy dress party as a ratatouille....

The same principle applies to shaving. Never ever try to do this on the morning of a special occasion. I made the mistake of doing this once. Needless to say, I was the only graduate in my year to have a commemorative photo that looks as if I tried to limbo-dance under barbed wire....

I blame Las Ketchup....

Tuesday, 8pm

Thought for the Day - Never tell anyone to watch where they're treading - they will always instantly stand on what you wanted them to avoid

Pug Status - Snoring peacefully through Holby City

Bring in the washing, shut all the windows and cancel the application for the evening class in Advanced Precipitation Manipulation - the rain finally came. At exactly the same time that I remembered I had left my trainers in the garden....

Obi Pug Kenobi detests the rain, leaving it to the very last minute to answer any call of nature and doing so with one leg off the ground to minimise paw contact on wet grass. So I spent the rest of the afternoon cleaning up after muddy paws and also trying to find an online supplier of pug-sized galoshes....

Just finished clearing up after dinner, not my favourite task in the world. No time-saving appliance saves less time than a dishwasher, especially if it's the one that I am using. More temperamental than a Hollywood star at a badly-attended premiere, it refuses to work if I put the dinner plates in there. Or if any dish or saucepan is incorrectly aligned by less than a millimetre. And, regardless of how carefully I load it, I always, always have one dish or pan that won't fit in....

So I have to wash up anyway. Which kind of defeats the point of having a dishwasher. And because the pans are quite dirty I make sure I run plenty of hot water. Which I forget is really hot about half a second after I put my hands in the bowl. (Only girls wear rubber gloves to wash up. And possibly also Customs officers). So there's a slight delay between me thinking "Oops, I shouldn't have done that really" and me screaming like a Samurai warrior who has just been smacked in the family jewels by the corner of a Steinway piano....

Mad Dogs and Englishmen....

Monday, 9.30pm

Thought for the Day - The freezer will always contain everything but what you fancy for dinner

Pug Status - Trying to pretend she's too old for play-fighting with naughty puppies....

I believe it was Joni Mitchell who told us all 'You don't know what you've got till it's gone'. Whilst the paving of Paradise to put up a parking lot was no doubt praised by those who no longer had to walk so far to the shops, I find myself agreeing in principle with Ms. Mitchell. After moaning about all the wet weather of a few weeks ago I am actually looking forward to a bit of rain and am currently looking through the Oaklands College prospectus in the hope of finding an evening course in Indian Rain Dance....

I acquired myself a fantastic sauna this morning, and it didn't cost me a penny. It's called my car. When I got in this morning it was that humid and fiery I had to check the back just to make sure I hadn't left an asthmatic dragon in there. All it needed was four middle-aged portly Swedish businessmen dressed only in towels idly discussing the merits of the latest Volvo....

Obi Pug Kenobi is escaping from the hot weather by conserving energy, with plenty of rest and lots of naps. Which seems to be her strategy for the cold weather of winter. And those tricky in-between Spring and Autumn days. We had a phone call today about getting some extra cover on her insurance but as she can barely see over the windscreen I didn't think it worth adding her as an extra driver....

Interested to hear Steve's eulogising of a particular brand of kitchen towel on Hertbeat breakfast this morning. I tried cleaning up a particular nasty vegetable oil spillage with a handful of Bounty once; I was picking bits of coconut and chocolate out of the worktop corners for a month....

Cricket, lovely cricket....!!!!

Sunday, 8pm

Thought for the day - Never trust anyone who says "It's only a ten-minute job"

Pug Status - Cooling off, belly down, on laminate flooring

A sweltering but very rewarding day with Carl & Lauren on the StreetBeat team at Stevenage Town Centre Gardens this afternoon. Lots of friendly people, some of whom bought copies of Steve's book 'Dear Mr DJ'! They all wanted signed copies so thank goodness Steve's signature is so easy to forge! (That was just a joke by the way. They were genuine Mr Folland signatures. And that's what I'll say to the court should they find that cheque-book of his in my garage....)

So, England have won the Ashes back from Australia - hurrah! I love cricket - any game that has a scheduled interval for tea couldn't be any more olde English. You half expect the players to take to the field wearing monocles and cravats, strolling to the wicket after demolishing piles of scones, Battenburg cake and buttered toasted crumpets. Any sport that encourages spectators to sit down for five days drinking beer is all right by me....

Obi Pug Kenobi continues to seek solace from the burning sun, taking every opportunity to stand in front of the fridge when the door opens (although this may also be just for a sneaky look at what she has for dinner). She even followed me into the shed this evening, where the final transformation of me turning into my Dad was completed - I was putting a small stick of wood aside specifically to stir paint with....

Must go and put some after-sun on my head. Just had a glance in the mirror and I look just like a Swan Vesta matchstick....

Does his front leg go through this bit...?

Thursday, 9pm

Thought for the Day - Why does everyone else always want a bath when I do?

Pug Status - Ensuring that no dropped biscuit goes to waste....

Tried out pug puppy Bob's brand new harness today (on Bob, not me obviously) - in preparation for his first walkies. Pugs have necks shorter than an August heat-wave so you can't attach a lead to their collar, you see. Bob being rather on the small side of 'Small Puppy' size, he ended up being 75% harness and 25% slightly confused....

Obi Pug Kenobi had a little accident on her walk today - in trying to avoid a nasty wasp she jarred her foot in a small hole in the grass, leaving her with a little limp. Luckily it got better fairly soon - in fact, mere moments after Daddy had carried her all the way back home she seemed to be able to rush into the kitchen for her dinner....

Tea-related disaster in the Castle household this evening as the wife severely over-estimated the dunking power of Malted Milk biscuit and was left with a cuppa thick enough to cement bricks. Very much like my beloved Barnet Football Club, her biccie went to pieces very easily in the Cup....

Loads of fuss at the Athletics World Championships as to whether the winner of the Women's 800 metres Final is really a man. This can be easily solved with a simple urine test. If she leaves the seat up then she's definitely a bloke....

Can I open a window?

Wednesday, 9.30pm

Thought for the Day - Never put off bringing washing in today as it is bound to rain tomorrow

Pug Status - Snaffling contraband puppy biscuits when she thinks Daddy isn't looking

Phew, what a scorcher! Almost brave enough to go topless in the garden but didn't want to get reported for indecent exposure. You know when it's a hot day when the back of your knees get runny. Had to brave a short car journey at about lunch-time and thank God for fabric seat covers - memories of my youth are forever scarred by the pain of bare legs on white-hot plastic car seats....

The reason for the journey was to drop the eldest off at her part-time job in the town. Driving past the Howard Centre I was reminded of an old girlfriend I used to go out with who worked at Marks & Spencer - she used to work in the lingerie department. She was a nice girl - but she never let me try anything on....

Took Obi Pug Kenobi out for a little walk this afternoon - not for too long though as there would have been more panting than the front row of a Take That concert. By the time we got back both our tongues were on the floor, and I almost had to shove my head in the water bowl with her....

Is there enough to make jam?

Tuesday, 10.30pm

Thought for the Day - The day you forget to put your rubbish out the night before is always the day the bin men turn up earlier than normal the following day

Pug Status - Putting the pup in his place

Mowing the back lawn again today, which seems to be growing at the rate of about a foot a day. For some unexplained reason it seems to grow much quicker in the bottom corner by the house whilst remaining patchy elsewhere - I am seriously considering letting it grow wild nearer the house and then brushing it back across the rest of the garden like a massive comb-over to give the illusion of a well-kept lawn....

All a little bit too warm for Obi Pug Kenobi, who sought the sanctuary of the cool laminate flooring of the front room. She enjoyed about two minutes of peace before being ambushed by Bob the Puppy - what ensued was a mad ten minutes of ear-chewing and chasing before the traditional pug pause for breath, which sounds like someone sawing through a tree trunk with an angry gibbon....

Loads of ripe blackberries on the brambles the other side of our back fence, so I ventured out with pie dish for a good scrump, only to venture straight back in for some gloves - so many scratches on my hands from the thorns it looked like I had high-fived with Edward Scissorhands. Managed to get quite a few but, typically, the most juicy-looking ones were out of reach. Got the step-ladder out of the shed, climbed up and began to help myself to the massive fruit. All went well for a little while until the step-ladder began to sink into the soft soil under my considerable weight, causing me to glide towards the earth like I was taking a ride downstairs on one of those stair-lifts....

This won't hurt much....

Monday, 10pm

Thought for the Day - Always expect the dishwasher door to be down when you walk into the kitchen

Pug Status - Neatly manicured and full of antidotes

A trip to the vets today - took Obi Pug Kenobi for a booster injection and nail trim, puppy Bob for his ten-week jab. Despite the presence of needles, there was just one heart-rending yelp before a mad scramble for the safety of the car - and that was just me after paying the bill. Poor Obi will have to pay a return visit to get her teeth scaled and polished in the near future and, given the cost of NHS treatment these days, I may well jump on the table with her....

Spent the rest of the afternoon scrubbing the kitchen - the dining room table is now so clean you could eat your dinner off it. Made the mistake of emptying the crumb tray on the toaster, which I can only assume was manufactured from scraps from the original Tardis judging by the knee-deep pile of toast shards on the kitchen floor. It was like being trapped on a giant bird-table....

Enjoying the lovely weather today - stuck on a Bob Marley CD, popped open a cold one, pulled up a deckchair and tried to pretend I was in Barbados, an illusion quickly shattered by the sound of very British lawnmowers. I was going to be brave and take my t-shirt off, but I can't do impressions....

Seemed to have accumulated a fair bit of garden and household rubbish this week. I rang the council to ask if it would be OK to have a skip outside my house. They said I could run, hop or cartwheel if it I wanted to....

Who's had the Coco Pops?

Sunday, 9.30pm

Thought for the Day - The scissors will always be in the dishwasher, half-way through a cycle, when you need to wrap a last-minute present

Pug Status - Belly up, in the garden, lapping up the rays

It's not very often that I get excited at food purchases - with the exception of the return of the Texan Bar a few years ago (although my teeth didn't thank me for it) - but I was taken back to my childhood when my wife returned home from the supermarket with a Variety Pack of cereals. As a kid, we only used to have Variety Packs when we went on holiday (along with any other cereal that contained chocolate, two pounds of sugar or - Praise Be! - both of these), BUT - it meant getting up at 4am in order to secure the only pack of Frosties ahead of my siblings, or finding ever more ingenious hiding places for a precious box around the holiday caravan (and there's nothing more heartbeaking than forgetting where you put them, only to sit down on the sofa and accidentally crush your Nut Clusters).

And, therein, lay the problem. Eight boxes of cereal of which only two contained anything exciting. And all of which contained a serving about the size of a gnat's swimming trunks. Which meant you either had the one box of Golden Nuggets and spend the rest of the morning licking crumbs of bird tables (and we've all been there - haven't we?), or you pigged out on all three boxes of corn flakes which, as a 'non-exciting' cereal, didn't make it feel like a 'holiday breakfast'....

Obi Pug Kenobi thinks they should invent Variety Packs for doggie breakfasts; flavour suggestions she has come up with so far include Postman's Trouser and Essence of Paperboy....

Disturbed to read about the recent jewellry raid in London, but I think I have come up with the ideal solution. Shops should surround their gem displays with the clear plastic wrapping used on blocks of cheese - it is easily the most impenetrable substance known to mankind....

Where do you keep your stuffing?

Thursday, 9.30pm

Thought for the Day - No transaction through a self-service supermarket check-out is without hassle, breakdown or a call to the supervisor

Pug Status - Showing interest in the new squeaky penguin toy....

No trip to the supermarket is without its problems. Sometimes you have to park so far away that you have to catch a bus back to the store. Occasionally it degenerates into a pitched battle over the last remaining small trolley in the bay. But nothing is as supremely irritating as using the self-serve checkout when you are in a hurry because you think it will save you time....

You will normally have one item in your basket that requires supervisor override - there will never be anyone around to help, so you end up looking round desperately like a paranoid meerkat whose mislaid his car keys. You will always remember to scan your clubcard just after you have finished paying. And you will always, always be told that there is an unexpected item in the bagging area, like you've just tried to purchase the Holy Grail or the Great Pyramids of Giza. You then have to formally introduce each item to the packing belt with an air of trepidation, which makes everyone using the machines look like they are doing some elaborate form of Tai Chi....

After spending most of the Jurassic period buying a bag of flour and some oven cleaner it was a relief to finally get home. I was expecting lots of excited wuffs, cuddles and friendly nose-licks from our Princess Pug - alas, she was expecting me to remember to buy her bedtime Princess Mints so I was well and truely in the dog-house. Again....

But I want the NEXT left!!!!

Wednesday, 7.30pm

Thought for the Day - Pay & Display car parks that require exact change will always end up costing 10p more than all the change you have

Pug Status - Warm and uncomfortable in the horrible weather

Suffering in the close, humid conditions. My wife said it was muggy today, but Muggy is the day before Tuesday, not the day after. Too hot for poor Obi, who is getting a bit cooked under all that fur. We bought an oscillating fan for her to sit in front of - it only took her a few minutes to get the hang of oscillating in sync with it....

Had to take the eldest to St. Albans for an interview - an ideal opportunity to get confused by the draconian one-way system, spending half an hour getting to within twenty metres from our chosen road only to be whipped round past the Abbey for the eighth time. Finally got there, and found that parking cost a pound for one hour. After emptying pockets, glove compartment, ashtray and lifting up the back seats I had ninety pence in change....

Knowing that a traffic warden can sniff out an un-stickered windscreen from half a mile away I needed to get some more coinage. Conveniently I had parked on a thoroughfare that contained two dentists, an osteopath, a doctor's surgery and a spa offering free Botox refills with every hot stone massage. Finally spied a small chemist and spent a panicky minute or so trying to find something to buy that was neither expensive or potentially embarrassing. Settled on a pack of waterproof plasters, which came in very useful as I ran back to the car to beat the swiftly approaching traffic warden, only to slip on the wet pavement and skid the last couple of metres or so on my knees, like a small boy on a wedding reception dance-floor....

Is it me or is it moist?

Tuesday, 7pm

Thought for the Day - The amount of rain falling in a back garden is directly proportionate to the amount of washing hung on the line

Pug Status - Happily sunbathing on the top step

Weeding the garden again - the toilet's still broken. But seriously - been trying to tidy up the garden a little. Was trying to tidy up the border - I had some complaints about untidiness from Passport Control - and Obi Pug Kenobi also popped over to me as I weeded by the fence. She had a little dig - but she's always making sarcastic comments about me....

Took all the empty glass to the nearby recycling banks and was slightly ashamed to see it consisted of 97 green beer bottles and one empty Dolmio jar. Went across the road to the supermarket in the hope of picking up a bargain - my neighbour had told me they had some chickens going cheap but you'd hardly expect them to bark, would you...?

Not much on the TV tonight - just a clock and a small vase of flowers. Thought I would entertain myself by dividing a piece of paper in half with a ruler and a pencil; well, you have to draw the line somewhere. Phoned my parents tonight to find out how my Dad got on at the dentist - he was having some fillings done. All went well although still a little painful - he his having trouble pronouncing his F's and his T's but he can't say fairer than that....

Must remember to take the rubbish out tonight. I promised that we'd go to the cinema....

Is this dog hair in my tea AGAIN???

Monday, 11pm

Thought for the Day - Why is it called Toad in the Hole?

Pug Status - Still moulting!!!!

Another day without rain in Welwyn Garden City so one would assume that we are mere hours away from the first drought warning of the Summer. I treated Obi to a walk around the park and thought it would be cute to try her on the swings but she flatly refused when I mentioned it - perhaps I should have suggested she sit in the swing and I push instead of the other way round....

There was a circus tent being set up and I thought I would go and chat to one of the clowns but decided against it as he was giving me a funny look. Then one walked past with a nun on his shoulders and I thought 'that's just virgin' on the ridiculous' so we headed for home....

Picked up one of the new Argos catalogues today. Well, I attempted to. Virtually gave myself a hernia. You need a fork-lift just to turn the pages. I gather that they account for 12% of the Earth's entire mass but I try not to believe everything I hear. 48.6% of statistics are made up on the spot, you know....

Tried a new cafe this evening for dinner but wasn't impressed. Heard a rumour that the chef put real shepherd in the Shepherd's Pie so decided against the Toad in the Hole. Nearly had the ox tongue but didn't fancy eating something that had come out of an animal's mouth. So I had a boiled egg instead....

Monday - again....

Sunday, 11.30pm

Thought for the Day - Why is there a catering tub of mincemeat still in my utility room?

Pug Status - Tolerating new arrivals

A busy weekend which, as is traditional, seemed to pass through quicker than a prune curry. Friday afternoon entices you to follow round the corner and before you know it, Monday morning has kicked you up the behind, pushed you against the wall and nicked your wallet.

I had hoped to go into London on Saturday evening to be in the audience at a Psychic night but it was cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances. The wife and I stayed home instead and played a game called 'Name the Piece of Furniture', which got very competitive - until we decided to call it a draw. In the end she suggested that a put a DVD on, but it didn't even go round my waist....

Obi Pug Kenobi has been looking after Bob, our new arrival, very well. Pugs are, by nature, a gluttonous breed so it was no surprise to see her teaching him how to beg. I found them outside Asda asking people if they could spare some change. Pugs, incidentally, were originally bred as lap dogs for the upper classes in China hundreds of years ago, which is probably explains why you start off with one as a pet, and half an hour later you want another one....

Left Just Past Thetford Forest....

Wednesday, 9.30pm

Thought for the Day - Cups of tea always taste better when they are made by someone else

Pug Status - Curious about the new arrival....

A trip out in the car again today, this time to the rugged mountainous landscapes of... East Anglia. I have spent more time behind the wheel in the last couple of days than Jeremy Clarkson, and I am starting to permanently smell like a Magic Tree air freshener....

We have a new arrival in the Castle household; a boy pug puppy called Bob who will no doubt become a loving companion to Obi Pug Kenobi. We were a tad worried that another hound about the house would put Princess Pug's nose out of joint but that would be almost impossible, their noses being smaller than the chances of a decent English summer....

Obi wanted to send a congratulatory bark to her 'Uncle Radio Steve' for the publication of his first book. She does enjoy getting her teeth into a good thriller, which does cause problems when I return them to the library and have to pay for the damage....

I think old age and senility is starting to creep up on me as I hurtle on towards the end of a fourth decade. Three things seem to happen as you get older; your hair gets grey, you get increasingly forgetful, and I can't remember what the other one is at the moment. Anyway, I shan't let it get me down. Whatever life throws at me I am determined to live it to the full and hope that I pass away as peacefully as my old grandad did, asleep in his chair. And not screaming, like his passengers.....

Average Speed Limit Check....

Tuesday, 10.30pm

Thought for the Day - Sat-Navs are programmed to lose their signal when approaching any junction with more than four exits

Pug Status - Trying to reach that elusive itchy bit

Had a job interview in Southampton so spent most of the day in the car, being annoyed by other inferior radio stations as I bade farewell to Hertbeat country, and wishing I'd not selected the 'No Motorway' option on the Sat-Nav. The way home was enlivened by increased levels of profanity as I managed to find myself in the middle of the biggest work of construction since Joan Rivers' last face-lift. I understand that the average number of eggs produced by a single adult herring in one spawning is 50,000. I can only assume they have been teaching this technique to orange traffic cones....

Eventually limped home via the back roads, the M25 having turned into the biggest jam since Paul Weller and Jam did a jam session in a huge vat of jam at a Jamboree (it was busy - I think you get the idea). Apparently there was a lorry that had overturned and shed its load of wigs and toupees, and traffic was halted whilst the police combed the area....

After unfolding myself from the car and staggering through the front door I was expecting to be met with a rush of paws and a happy bark or two - no such luck. Princess Pug lifted her head from her cushion mid-snore, gave me a "what kept you?" look and headed out to the kitchen to wait for her evening feed. I apologised for her late dinner, blaming the roadworks, but she just gave me the hard shoulder....

Looking Like A Dog's Breakfast....

Monday, 10.30pm

Thought for the Day - Does anyone have the Odd Sock Fairy's email address?

Pug Status - Hoping Daddy didn't see the chocolate biscuit Grandad sneaked for me....

This painting lark is never-ending. Upstairs today finishing off the doors and I must say, I think I have captured Jim Morrison's likeness fairly well. Holding a paintbrush for so long, I seem to have evolved into Captain Hook's less evil painting-and-decorating brother and the last thing I want is a load of flying kids crashing into my freshly applied gloss. I have every sympathy with Michaelangelo - seven years to do one ceiling seems to be rushing it as far as I'm concerned....

Obi Pug Kenobi is sticking to her diet - well, she has no choice. Too short to reach the cupboards and without the necessary opposable thumbs to raid the fridge she has taken to scanning the floor for dropped morsels and boy, does she find them! A visit to her Nanny and Grandad gave her an opportunity to work all her charm for an illicit treat. How can anyone resist those soulful eyes and glossy coat - no wonder Grandad gets money off his paper bill every week....

As you hear this in the morning I shall be busy rustling up a sumptuous meal of freshly-scrambled free range eggs, slowly cooked to glossy perfection and coated with smooth gratings of extra-matured cheddar cheese, gently melting into the fluffy perfection. For Princess Pug. I'll be having Special K and a cup of tea. I spoil that dog....

Sunday, 10.30pm

Thought for the Day - Wickets are only taken in cricket matches on TV just as I leave the room

Pug Status - Strangely enjoying charcoal biscuits

Another busy weekend; the grass has finally, finally been cut - a tricky operation given I had to hold the lawnmower above my head to begin with - and the neighbours have their privacy restored as walking on the back lawn does not mean our feet are level with the top of their fence.

Obi Pug Kenobi has been struggling a little with her new diet as she attempts to shift a few unwanted grammes; she doesn't mind a slightly longer walk although she has drawn the line at the fitness video and exercise bike. The new regime means giving her a small breakfast when I get up in the morning. This was fine at the start of last week but, being a clever pug and one that sleeps in our bedroom, she started waking me up half an hour earlier each morning in an attempt to get her food quicker until by Thursday it felt like she was waking me up before I went to bed....

By Friday I had a small selection of doggie biccies at the ready to temp her with in the hope of getting a few minutes more sleep. This kept her quiet but had the adverse effect of filling the duvet with Bonio shards, so an early morning slumber becomes more like bedding down in a quarry....

An early Saturday start as I chauffered the wife to the tattoo parlour, from where she emerged a while later with a handsome caricature of our Princess Pug on her shoulder alongside a paw-print of the Barbados flag, a reminder of our honeymoon (my reminder would probably be a tattoo of an empty wallet....). It does look good though....

Must remember to hoover the bed before getting in tonight....