Shurely Shome Mishtake....

Tuesday, 8.30pm

Thought for the Day - The length of the traffic jam a mile from home relates directly to the fullness of your bladder

Pug Status - Jammed in the corner of the settee, snoring her head off

A slight problem with my little car is slowly becoming a little pimple of inconvenience on the bottom of normality. The driver's side door won't open with the door key so I have to open the passenger side door and lean out.

Not too much of a problem but a little embarrassing at petrol stations and also a bit fraught if I park anywhere on slight nearside-offside slope, as I lunge across the gear-stick to use the inside handle then gallop round as fast as I can so that it doesn't slowly swing out into oncoming traffic....

I had an email at work today from one of the bid writers, commenting that one of the documents in the case study database had spelling and grammar errors. He had spelt 'grammar' wrong in his email....

Obi Pug Kenobi is suffering from Seasonal Affect Disorder I think; she has seemed a bit depressed since the clocks went back and she now has to venture out for a walk in the rain and cold. There's nothing that quite tugs on the heart strings as a pair of chocolate brown eyes peering out from a mask of dejection with an expression that says 'please take me away from all this...'

Who's the Goblin in the Nappy?

Wednesday, 9pm

Thought for the Day - Raw onions are never a good idea - especially when you have to kiss your mother goodbye

Pug Status - Severely affronted to find another pug in her chair

A toasty house and a hot pug on my lap - who could ask for more?

Had a very interesting few days at work, culminating in our department running an Autumn Fayre as a promotion for the rest of the firm to enjoy. Each of us had to help run a different stall, such as 'Splat the Rat' or 'Trick or Treat', but ours was a 'Whose Baby' competition with each of us submitting a cute (or, in my case, not so cute) photo....

Now, people who know me know that my memory is legendary. I am famously absent-minded and so it would come to no-one's surprise that I forgot to ask my parents for a photo until the night before the deadline. Luckily, Facebook came to my rescue, in the form of one of my siblings who has posted a photo of me in all my Terry-towelling chubby-cheeked glory! I quickly copied and cropped the pic and emailed it on to my colleague who was coordinating the picture board....

Unfortunately..... the scanning process and subsequent retouching for the purposes of display left my photo with a decidedly green tinge, making me look like the youngest goblin in the enchanted wood....

Still enjoying the driving to and from work - but I face a dilemma. Perhaps someone could help me out here - is it wrong for me to snigger to myself every morning that I drive past signs for The Camp Industrial Estate....??

It's a long time, and not just in politics....

Monday, 8.30pm

Thought for the Day - BBC Radio Oxford traffic alerts only ever come on the radio when you are at least ten miles away from Oxford, and nowhere else

Pug Status - Guarding her dinner from a greedy puppy....

Has it really been a week since my last blog post? A busy weekend what with shopping, cleaning, hallow'eening ad trying to drag a reluctant Princess Pug out for a walk in the kind of weather that even Gene Kelly would balk at hoofing through with an outsized brolly....

We thought that Obi Pug Kenobi may have taken umbrage at our fancy dress garb for next door's Hallow'een party, what with the wife dressed up as the Wicked Witch of the West and me sporting a greasepaint 'tash as Super Mario but she never even bothered to offer up a slight wuff; possibly being hunkered down in the comfiest armchair snuggled up in a warm blanket may have had something to do with her 'can't be bothered' attitude....

She did, though, get worked up into a frenzy this evening. With the fridge. What happened was that her dinner bowl slowly moved nearer and nearer to it as she attacked her liver and special pug biscuits - as it came to rest against the fridge door some biccies fell out and under the naughty chiller, tantalisingly out of reach of her little snout.

Of course, when you first come into the kitchen to be confronted with a small dog barking at a fridge door, it's really difficult to find a rational explanation....